"I just have a question about this picture I'm looking at."

"No problem, what would you like to know?"

"Can you tell me what it looks like?"

PAUSE. "It's... ah."

"I'm looking at the one you labeled 'bronze.' What color is it?"

"Well, it's um. Bronze. Like in the picture? I'm holding the sample to the screen and the color is true, at least on mine."

"Hm. Okay. But what does it look like? What color is it?"

PAUSE. "If you'd like I can mail you a sample, or you can come pick it up if that's easier?"

"Oh no that's not necessary, you can just tell me what it looks like." 

A chapter of my memoir will be called, "Things I Collect: Grocery Lists and Weirdos." 

"...Also, Dresses From Thrift Stores. Also Pictures of Myself. This is Going to be a Long Chapter."